I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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