Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
