didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
