apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
love makes seman taste better
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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