ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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