yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize