I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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