the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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