fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
