no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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