all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize