Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I deserve this hangover.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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