So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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