we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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