Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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