yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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