Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
