I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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