she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
