Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
