i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
