Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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