Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
