Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
