so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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