Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
