I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
