is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
oh god was she eating orange peels again
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
