Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
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