whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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