never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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