I don't think brook has ever known best
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
