I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize
