Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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