I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
