fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
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