I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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