Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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