Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
