I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
they're like a gay fantastic four
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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