lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
