we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
