We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
