Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
