Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize
