I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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