we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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