i just google imaged poop.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Randomize
