Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
