He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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