she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
